I have some very strong views about children and television. This is because as a child I spent many hours watching television and I absolutely loved it. I loved it so much that I would rather watch it than go out and play with my friends; it was on while I did my homework, if I had friends over, during meals, all the time!
As an adult, I found myself completely addicted to watching television, and whenever I was at home, the TV would be on. Unfortunately, I found myself watching anything and everything including some of the most useless, least informing, most outrageous chat shows that have ever appeared on our TV screens. And this would often mean that I would spend hours vegetating on the sofa, instead of doing something more constructive, like study for my exams, or clean my poor house.
As I grew older, people started to question TV advertising (cigarette and junk food advertising, advertising to children, and so on), and the morality of some TV shows. This opened my eyes to the influence of TV in our lives. Television shows introduce the culture of the country in which they are made, and often attempt to address certain social issues.
But do you really want your children to be influenced by these values, and the point of views expressed in those shows? I know that I would rather teach my children my own moral values and my own views on society. On top of that, I cannot believe the sexual imagery in some adverts, particularly perfumes, and in music videos, which often also include violence.
For these reasons and because I don't want my children to become couch-potatoes, tele-addicts, I restrict how much television my children are allowed to watch. Shortly after the birth of my first child, I realized that I could find on YouTube all the cartoons that I used to watch as a child. These are in Italian which is handy because it supports their language learning, and they are also so old fashioned that they don't have any undesirable content!
Watching TV is such a passive activity, which really doesn't challenge the child to do much, just watch and listen. Some of my friends insist that some children TV shows are very educational, and the kids learn the alphabet, and counting and so much more. Well, I would rather teach it to them myself. So, allowing the children to watch these short videos is ideal for me not only because I can control what they watch, but also because I can easily decide how long they will spend staring at a screen, and if they get to watch three of these videos, they think I'm very kind and generous, but they will last no more than 20 minutes in total!
I came across your site when reading Ginger Beirut.
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Thank you for the post! I couldn't believe it when I was reading! My case exactly!
I was a TV addict myself. I used to spend about 6 hours per evening "watching anything and everything including some of the most useless, least informing, most outrageous chat shows that have ever appeared on our TV screens"! Until I realized that I was wasting my life away. So when I moved out of my parents’ house I banished TV from my life! Soon I was reading books again…
When I got married, my wife agreed that we don’t have a TV at home. Whenever we “stay in for a date”, usually dinner and movie, we rent/buy a DVD or watch an old (clean) movie from YouTube. But now we have a son. We both agree that for the first couple of years, we don’t want him to watch TV. I occasionally show him a short cartoon or an educational animation on my laptop, 6 min max. Sometimes we let him watch an Audrey Hepburn movie with us… But my wife would like to have a TV later on. She argues that there are very nice educational series and documentaries that are a must, such as National Geographic and Animal Planet. I am still not convinced. My son is now 20 months old and I would really welcome a feedback on how things work out for you guys…
In our household we are also trilingual. I am half-Trinidadian, half-Lebanese, living in Lebanon with a mixed American-French education. My wife is a Belgian Lebanese. We are moving to Brussels in a couple of weeks. Many people tell us that we are confusing my son with all the languages and that it will cause him to speak later than his pears. We found a nice arrangement. I speak with him English, my wife speaks with him French and my wife and I speak Arabic with each other. He is now starting to speak and he chooses the easiest word in each language. For example he says “eau” (French pronounced ‘o’) for ‘water’, “daw” (Arabic) for light, and “come” to ask us to follow him… How did it work out for you?
I really appreciate your feedback,
Nadim Bayeh
doudouli@terra.net.lb
Thank you for your comment and for sharing your story. My kids are now 4 and 6, and we still control how much TV they watch. They get to see it after dinner at the weekend (Fridays and Saturdays, and Sunday afternoons). We select family-friendly shows or films. And occasionally, as a reward for good behaviour, I might put on a cartoon on YouTube - preferably in Italian or Farsi. I think your wife is right to want to introduce some educational TV, as long as the TV is not used as a babysitter, but you sit with your son and maybe chat about what he's seeing. Make sure you clarify from the beginning that 'we're going to watch only this programme' and then turn off the TV when it's over.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you have a wonderful arrangement to teach your languages to your son. Don't worry about what people say: they will always find something to say! To address what I call the language mix-and-match with my children, I would let them say what felt natural, then remind them of the Italian word, and ask them to repeat. Always be gentle and joyful, make it fun and children respond positively. As my children grew older, they started to fill in the gaps and mix less and less. However, it still happens, so don't worry about it, just stick with it and it will work. The most important thing is that you don't mix your languages.
Hope this helps!